Posts

31st of July, 2 years ago

-
 I thought that it would be the last poem I ever wrote for you exactly on the 31st of July, 2 years ago and that the end of our relationship would also mean the end of heartbreak but it wasn't  you made me a promise, that everything would be better than before that it would all be okay I don't think you quite understood the concept when you made that promise the one where being okay takes time and effort I still take all the blame I'm the one who got us here, with my incessant need for being loved and valued and with being manipulated every single time mistaking cruelty for depression, faithfulness for devotion, indifference with anger and when the moment of realization came, I questioned myself were you the problem, or was I incapable of showing affection and appreciation maybe I was cold and distant, bitter at times, too emotional or even unstable did I question your love out of nowhere, was I making things up I thought maybe love comes in different forms that maybe it wa...
Post a Comment
Read more

Hate

-
I fucking hate you yes, you, you who knows exactly who you are, to the point where I don't even need to address you by name I hope you fucking die, I hope you just disappear off the face of the earth, so that I never have to see your stupid face again I hate hearing your name, seeing your picture, and especially remembering anything about you I hate you I have so much hate in my heart, that I don't know where to put it I want to stuff it in a box, along with all your stuff, and forget you ever existed I want to rip my heart out because it aches so much I want you to go to the end of a cliff, and just fucking jump, hell, I'll even be the one to push you off if you need help I hate the fact that I loved you, that I loved you so much to the point where I excused all of your bullshit, and that it was enough to ignore every stupid thing you ever said, or did I loved you so much that being broken up with you made me disassociate so bad that I didn't even realize that my mom ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Twenty-six

-
 6 days ago she turned 26 Another year of repeating the same mistakes She took you back, thinking things would be different Just because you promised her it would be But then you asked her to be a daisy Even though you knew deep-down she was a wildflower And she started feeling like an extra in your play again Keeping her around for your personal gain She left the man who loved her, to be with the one who ignored her Thinking they could go back to the way things once were And the image of how you were remains a blur Even if she knows you love her Now she sleeps in the bed alone at night And eats to push down the feelings building up inside She takes long walks alone to drown out the noises in her head Telling her to get out while she's ahead What she doesn't tell you is the following: She can't forget the things you did Or everything you said And especially the way you lost her pet She also doesn't love you the way she used to And sees clearly now, that you will never m...
Post a Comment
Read more

Orange

-
 I've always loved orange I loved the color, which brought me brought joy and comfort depending on the shade I loved it on my nails, but even more on my eyes I loved the taste,  depending on what I pair it with I loved it in my salad, but even more when covered in chocolate I loved being with men who love orange, which was the only thing they had in common I loved one, who broke my heart And another, who puts it back together I've always loved orange But I think I love it most when it's in my bed, and even more when it stays
Post a Comment
Read more

Artichoke

-
 It was difficult to tell you how I really felt And even after all these years, I think it still is So I'm sitting and writing it all down In hopes that if I do, I'll never have to think of you again You came into my life exactly 3 summers ago And you made me feel in ways that I thought I never would I understood why I loved that line from my book so much Because I finally felt what it means to know that whatever souls are made of, yours and mine are the same I don't know exactly when or why you started changing And I have no idea how you convinced yourself that it was me who did But I do know that I'll never forgive you I hate to admit it, but you actually somehow managed to break my heart I hate that when I think about the future, I know that you won't be in it We'll never get to move and buy a house to build from scratch And you won't design it, and I won't decorate it We'll never sleep on the floor and drink wine out of the bottle  We'll neve...
Post a Comment
Read more

Bars

-
Dear Adam, I miss you Sometimes more than usual I've been thinking that maybe you were right about everything I did push you away and I was scared It's been a year since I haven't called you to tell you about my day A year since I've banged on your wall to talk about our issues for hours Exactly a year since you've passed me a drink from between the bars of the balcony I couldn't feel or I wouldn't let myself to I may have wanted to believe that at time but now I'm not so sure I don't know why I need you so much and why I didn't do anything to change what happened I don't know why we both left each other All I know is that you were right about everything and that you were one of the sincerest relationships I've had I hope one day I'll get the courage to tell you all this but for the time being, thank you For everything. Sincerely yours, The Girl Behind Bars
Post a Comment
Read more

ig

-
you did something today that I wasn't able to do because a part of me wanted to hold on you reminded me of who I used to be so naive and impressionable, let you manipulate me I left you because it was the right thing to do you left me with a broken spirit but you did it today, finally broke the loop and in doing so my love, you set us both free for that, I am forever grateful
Post a Comment
Read more